The Best Part About

If I were to describe myself in one sentence:

She is an optimistic girl with many crazy ambitions who is determined and has faith in her hard work to conquer.

That, I believe, is what defines and is the best part that motivates and inspires me to be the best version of myself every morning. Since I was 8, I used to take a piece of paper and plan my entire day of everything I needed to do. I loved studying, chess, the arts. I trained myself to make the most out of the time I had - that was the one thing I valued the most, time. I have experienced time so closely as a kid that I never took advantage of it. Yet I complain that 24 hours is too less, I need more!

When I reflect back, I see my growth towards my ambitions and passions. I used to give a pat on my back because I motivated myself to do better despite all adversities in my life. I genuinely want to thank my mother for giving me the self-confidence and freedom to develop my identity and personality. Yes, there is always that voice in my head that pushes me for perfection regardless. I believe in finding beauty and contentment in the process, but one must never forget the destination. When I look at myself in the mirror, I see a strong, determined, hardworking individual.

When I was 11, I created a social media presence. When I was 15, I started my YouTube channel. In my spare time, I studied the psyche of the human mind, pursued the arts, and clicked photographs to cherish all the memories. Every day was a new beginning, and I took that quite literally. There are many things to do, stories to write, photos to click, things to learn, people to meet, and I still take my piece of paper planning to all out. And although you can not plan every hour of your life because life is a surprise element, having a planner or a things-to-do list is encouraging and helps you look forward to your day.

That is the best part about me. I am a free bird pursuing anything and everything I put my mind to. I love being creative and expressive. With all my knowledge and experiences, I want to become an even better version of myself. Thank you for believing in me for those who have been a part of my crazy journey. It has been a hell of a crazy creative life, but it's the beauty of my mind that makes me fall in love with my life every single day.

Healthy and Happy, for Yourself

Your past, present, future, is it all worth it? Are you content with the situation you are living in? All the sacrifices, all the pain you suffered, was all that even necessary? Have you forgiven yourself for conditions you did not have control over? Do you look in the mirror and accept reality or do you avoid it and ignore it saving it for another day? Are you happy with the journey you let so far? Do you love the people around you? Do they motivate you and help you in becoming a better person? Are you in love with your day-to-day life, or are you doing it for the sake of doing it? Have you imagined what your life might be like in the next 5 or 10 years? Are you working towards it? Is your purpose in life just surviving, or do you wish to be an inspiration to this world? You realize that we only have one life; are you making the most out of every day? Have you loved and accepted yourself, the person you are inside and outside? When was the last time you treated yourself, bought yourself a gift, or cooked your favorite meal? Do you give yourself care and attention, or do you wait for another individual to fulfill your desires? Do you get heartbroken and disheartened when someone doesn’t meet your expectations, or do you forgive? What are your limitations, principles, values, boundaries? What if someone breaks your rules? Do you leave the relationship or tolerate it? Is your life even real, or has someone trapped you in their fantasies? Are you happy with your partner, children, colleagues? Is there anyone’s energy that always throws you off? How do you cope with disappointments? Is your coping mechanism healthy or unhealthy? Are your decisions leading you to more harm or good? Are you the type to keep a grudge, or do you move on and forget? Did you know that being a wife, husband, employee or student are parts of your life and not whole? Do you let these relationships consume your everyday life?

It’s important to ask these questions to yourself from time to time so you do not get too carried away or consumed with one aspect of your life. It would help if you prioritized yourself above everything, yes, even in do-or-die situations. Enough rest, sleep, and care will help you with productivity and creativity. Don’t ever let an individual or a situation occupy your entire mind. Take a breath of fresh air, go out and come back to the problem. Even 5 minutes can help you get better clarity of your obstacles. Never let anyone tell you that you can not. I promise you; you can. Be there for yourself, love yourself. Your kidneys, liver, and intestines do not know the situation you are dealing with so give yourself nourishment. Live life for yourself; you need yourself. Pat yourself on the back; you made it far all by yourself.

How to Simplify Your Life?

Too many complications cause you to overthink, feeling overwhelmed, and consumed in problem – these situations are unnecessary, and it's all just part of life. Take it from me; ever since I was very young, it's always been a proportion of 90% problems and 10% happiness. And those problems would be something completely different every time. It would be new, something completely unrelated, and spontaneous. I would be shocked to hear something when I am least expecting it.

But I am not here to talk about your problems or my problems. It is not about solving them either, because there are problems which exist in your life which do not have a solution.

This blog is about staying still, staying intact even when life is going in all different directions. For me to lead a smooth and simple life, I only focus on what I can control. What are the priorities which you can deal with by yourself? Make that list. What I usually do is make a things-to-do list, create comfortable deadlines, schedule it in a way where it's realistic and accomplishable. You are already dealing with so much that whatever you do now, do it in baby steps. This will help you live in the present and help you do what needs to be done now. But what about all the problems in the past? Or what about all of the issues which may come in the future.

Being an experienced human, I will not tell you, "don't look back, move forward."

There may be severe problems that happened in your past. Maybe those traumas affect you in your present situation. Give yourself time, but the world does not wait for anyone. So for a more practical approach, I would say give yourself 5 minutes to cry. Just cry, let it out. Accepting your past will help you move ahead more than avoiding it. Things happened, things happened, it hurts you obviously because you are a human. Five minutes, give yourself time to let it out. Bring yourself to an agreement and, most importantly, a closure.

What about the problems which I know can arise in the future?

The future is unknown and can not be determined, true. But we all have an instinct where sometimes we know this could happen or there is a possibility. Since we can not control the future, it is not tangible; I would be aware of it. For example, if you know that you have a medical condition that might lead to something in the future, you could bring changes that you could get in your lifestyle, which may help. Being aware is essential for knowledge. Knowledge is money in today's world.

I know this is a lot, and there is much more, but the past, present, and future are all there is in life. Everything should balance each other out to simplify life. These are just some strategies that I use to stay sane. And focus on that 10% of happiness in your life. See everything is up here, in your mind.

If you want to take it a step further, see if you can make the 10% of happiness 99.9%? It's possible only if you allow your mind to believe it is.

Tell About a Time: Acknowledgement and Appreciation

Tell about a time when an individual hurt you and how that situation impacted you and shaped you as a person today.

I have learned a significant number of things from relationships. I have undergone pain in relationships. There was betrayal in terms of cheating, disrespect, putting the other person down. All the things that went wrong and hurt me helped me learn to differentiate between healthy and unhealthy relationships.

Never give an individual that authority that they dare to ever put you down.

I have never been a person who boasts about my efforts in a relationship. I enjoy doing things to make the other person happy. It satisfies me when I make someone smile. When I truly love someone, I am the type of person who would think of creative ways to express my love. I don’t wait for Valentine’s Day or birthdays; I like celebrating love spontaneously.

Moreover, I do not do things for anything in return. I am not calculative or keep track of things like that. I am all about making moments the best it can be. The only thing which I expect is acknowledgment. Appreciation could be an obligation for some people, so I will not even go there. But the necessary minimum requirement, in my opinion, is acknowledgment. One cannot take an individual for granted. A person can be going through much effort, and by merely saying, “you did not do anything” or not even take into account what the person went through is disrespectful. I learned that I want to be pampered and loved now, but on a serious note, I learned that I need to walk away from people who take me for granted. It is tough for people who have a lot of love to have that determination to draw a line. But it is so crucial for your mental health. It won’t hurt anybody’s ego if they acknowledge the effort their partner puts in the relationship.

As a person I am today, I have given myself a lot of love. I give myself credit, give a pat on my back when I accomplish my goals. I also pamper myself for all my hard work. I believe that appreciating yourself can help you feel good about yourself. On the daily, one should understand that one has done the best one could, and one deserves a reward for it. If I get my beauty sleep and eat nutritious food, it helps me to be more productive. I do not blame myself; I am not harsh on myself.

I understand and accept that I have my strengths and weaknesses; that makes up the person I am.

I love all my good qualities and accept my flaws. With that, I do the best I can in any given situation. Don’t let anybody let this beautiful relationship with yourself take it away from you.

There are many people out there with an inferiority complex who will crumble you by exaggerating your mistakes. Do not let anybody tell you are weak. Believe in your potential because these people will make you feel down because that makes them feel superior. This is how it works; once they successfully fit into your mind that “you were incapable of doing something and feel sorry and guilty for it,” they will automatically feel like they are better than you. It is messed up, and don’t let anybody mess with your head. Before you get into a relationship, you need to understand yourself. Know about your powers and limitations. And never give another person the authority to tell who you are and what you are capable of. If anyone does not acknowledge your efforts, tells you that you did not “do anything”; walk away. This may seem subtle, but through my experience, I can say one thing for sure that this will eventually bring one’s self-confidence low over the years. They will stop listening to themselves and be dependent on how the other person tells them how good or bad they are. Don’t go there. You do not want to be at a place like this or with an individual like this. 

A relationship should be where both the partners unconditionally support each other through good and bad times.

Moreover, the two individuals should whole-heartedly contribute to the relationship. The contribution is not one-sided. A relationship is teamwork, and although efforts cannot be calculated, participation is equally valuable. Otherwise, one person would be having pleasure while the other is drained, keeping the relationship alive. 

Also, appreciate. I know it’s a lot, but a thank you has never done any harm. A simple thank you can help the other person feel appreciated. It shows to them that you noticed and admired. We all need love and acceptance in this world. We all want someone who understands us for the person we are. Even if she made you a vanilla cake, when you wanted strawberry cake – it is the intention which counts, which is that she baked you a cake. If someone is going an extra step, tell them you noticed and give thanks.

Letter to Future Self by a 15 Year Old

High school so far for me has gone by way too fast than it should have been. It has had both its ups and downs. I wonder now about high school life and how it would be for the next two years. A lot of things have changed. Whatever I have dealt in high school, whether good or bad, has made me a better and more mature person right now. And I know this is not it yet. There are more things to learn in life, but whatever high school has taught me so far would never be forgotten. I don’t think that I would be ever overloaded with academic work, as I am not taking very many advanced placements or honors classes. The thing that would affect is the little things. For example, managing friends and school together, time limits, making time for other things. I believe that high school is probably the hardest stage of your life, not because of academics and little things like that. Highschool is the hardest stage because people undergo a lot of physical and mental changes right now. People never think about what they say or say what they think. Every individual is confusing in his or her way. It is hard to deal with other people’s emotions and mood swings while you are trying A’s and 100% in your AP and honors class.

My goal for high school and after is to be a better person, and I want to learn and keep learning from life. After high school, I want to pursue art, along with the philosophy of psychology. I will somehow take the right amount of courses to be a psychiatrist, a child psychiatrist. I don’t have very many close friends in school. It is sad now that I think that the people I hang around with every day during lunch know nothing about it as if there is no depth in our friendships. And the best friend I have whom I thought we would be friends there has ben only drama. My best memory of high school so far was probably all the memories I spent with my best friend, like the basketball games we have been through, and everyday fun that had happened. Little nicknames we had for each other that I still remember were… I had great times with my friend, and I cherish all the moments we shared. I try to look into our friendship and try to look for what I learn from it, but I guess that doesn’t help me forget it. Although my life is way beyond complicated right now, I hope and will try to do very well academically and do well on my finals and get my grade up. I can not sacrifice my grades for someone who lives in my past and not my present.

-Deepasha

Benefits of Being Single

There are so many plus points in being single. This is coming from a person, who has been single for quite some time now so you can trust me on this one. Being in a relationship is not a need, it’s is a want/will. What you need is giving yourself the same amount of love and pampering, as you would expect from a significant other. Yeh… you can do everything by yourself that someone else can do for you emotionally. Do you know what is the biggest benefit in that? That you will never let yourself down. A lot of things come along when you are in a relationship. Yes, this is also coming from a person who has been in a relationship for many years. With a lot of happiness that comes from loving someone, it can also bring a lot of sadness. Now if you are single, you will be self-loving, self-caring and not let yourself be sad right? Yeh, there can be a secondary entity who/which can bring you down, but you cannot be the sole reason to be unhappy.

Now talking about the fun things, do you have any idea how fun it is to spend the entire 24 hours to yourself? Focusing on your happiness and self-growth? You are not answerable, and you do not own anyone a justification. You can pursue all your hobbies and interest with all this time in your hands. You do not have to be glued to your phone waiting for the other person’s texts and calls. Nobody’s opinion will influence your decisions. Moreover, you have all this freedom and peace of mind.

To all my single people,

don’t feel bad for being single. Look at the brighter side and enjoy this time and spend it on yourself. Pamper yourself and be there for yourself. Be self-dependent if that’s even a word.

For my single people who are looking or waiting to find their significant other,

quickly enjoy your free time now, because sooner or later you will have a long rollercoaster journey to go through. Just Kidding!

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Now is a single life better than being in a relationship?

There isn’t a concrete answer. With how this world is coming about it has become more and more difficult in finding the right partner. When people do find love, over the years they give up for the differences which build up. So being single is playing safe because you can guarantee yourself happiness. If you want to be in a relationship, it is important to be emotionally, mentally and physically ready and also finding the right partner who you see a bright future with.

Sounds Like a "Them" Problem

Self-confidence is a skill that I try developing every single day, whether it is reflected in my behavior, words, or even my thoughts. The minute I catch myself self-doubting, I immediately correct myself. I have recently learned that it is very important to trust yourself. You are going to be with yourself for a long time now, it is good to have a loving relationship with yourself.

There have been many times these past few weeks where I have questioned myself, “what if”, “if this, then what”- trying to assume the consequence before even acting upon it. Questions like these often lead to thoughts like “you know what, forget it” “never-mind” “I won’t even because it won’t matter anyway”.

First of all, you are right!

Second of all, your feelings are valid!

Believe in yourself, because if you won’t then who will? Assure yourself, which will help you feel motivated and grow your confidence. If people give you reasons to not believe, give yourself reasons to believe. You do not need to modify your thoughts or words according to what others “may” feel like. Because at the end of the day what matters is your happiness, if you are happy others will be too!

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Other’s must learn to deal with you the way you are if they want you in their lives. Or like I say “sounds like a them problem.”